The Play With Plague: TNA Report For 06/04/09

Sorry for that little break. Finals suck; I had no time to write this. Regardless, last week Sting took over and made some changes in the Mafia: No women and no security. Foley will only defend the belt once a year. Tazz told Joe to take out the Mafia, except Sting. We had two big returns: Raven, and “The Franchise” Shane Douglas (what the hell happened to him? In 2005 he still jacked! Now…just wow.)

Lauren is with the guy who ate Shane Douglas, who asks him about what he did to Daniels last week. Shane, showing he has lost no ego, only muscle and hair color, says that he’s here to make a point in TNA, and to be heard for a long time.

Match 1: Kiyoshi & Basher vs. Daniels & Suicide

Basher and Daniels start off, with Basher gaining the advantage, chopping and punching, but Daniels takes control, and hits a lift kick. Gutwrench suplex, then Daniels tags in Suicide, who enters with a guillotine leg drop, and hits some head buts. Kiyoshi kicks Suicide in the head while bouncing off of the ropes. Basher takes the advantage, and they double team Suicide in the corner. Kiyoshi gets tagged in and face plants Suicide, gets up, and kicks him in the head. Covers and gets a 2 count. Basher is back in, and we see more double teams. Suicide and Basher trade punches, but Basher hit’s a power slam, and Kiyoshi comes in and does a double team kick on Suicide.

Kiyoshi goes for a back body drop, but Suicide flips over and lands a capture suplex. Suicide tags in Daniels, who rampages and nails running clotheslines and kicks. Basher takes a cheap shot from behind, and takes advantage. Daniels blocks a double team in the corner, then takes both out with a face buster/clothesline. Daniels and Suicide hit a rolling crash and moonsault combination on Kiyoshi. Basher breaks up the pinfall attempt, then Suicide takes him out, and lands a slingshot outside the ring. Basher is “injured” and the ref checks on him. Suicide gets taken out by the MMG and Lethal Consequences. Daniels hits a rock bottom, then signals for the BME. Shane Douglas comes in from behind and smacks Daniels with a chain. Basher throws the ref back into the ring, and Kiyoshi covers.

Winners: Basher & Kiyoshi
Match Rating: 7/10

We come back to see Douglas on a chair with a mike. We see a recap of what just happened. Cause I forgot already. He tells Daniels not to take it personally, but its strict business. He’s a fan of TNA apparently, and watching a few weeks ago, he heard JJ disrespecting the legends. He now wants his second chance like Daniels got. And until he does, he’s going to continue to make life miserable on TNA. Yep, miserable. To one person. After or close to the end of a match.

Mick is with JB, who asks whether or not he is really lobbying to have the World Champion defend only once a year instead of 30 days. He says yes, because he’s a champion not a menstrual cycle. He brings up the Super Bowl, and how it would be so much less important if it was held once a month. The thing is, crazy [ beep ] or not, he’s right. It would be a lot more important. Oh but since he mentioned it, WOOO!!! GO STEELERS!!! Anyway, Cute Kip comes in, and says that he needs to be back on the roster. Mick explains that money’s tight, and that he’d consider it. Nash and Jenna are now in, and questions the cage match for tonight. He says that he doesn’t care about ratings, only money. Foley offers triple, but Kevin holds out for quadruple. Screw you. JB then asks, you told Kip money was tight. Mick says, it is…for Kip.

Lauren is with the MMG and Lethal Consequences. Next is Sabin and Creed vs. Beer Money. The Guns say that they don’t like LC, but they’re setting aside differences to solve the Suicide mystery. LC says that they hate the Guns, but agree.

Match 2: Sabin & Creed vs. Beer Money

Roode and Sabin start it off, and Roode locks in an arm wrench, but Sabin does a flipping counter. Roode lands a hip toss, Storm makes a blind tag. Sabin goes for a springboard DDT, but Storm comes in and BM nails a double suplex on Sabin. Creed comes in, but Storm takes advantage and hit’s a crazy slam. Sabin pulls Storms hair and tags in, lands some hits, then Creed is back in. Clotheslines, then Sabin is back in, and double team on Storm. They both try a springboard, but collide. Roode gets in and cleams house. Spinebuster to Creed, but Sabin breaks the pin attempt. The British Invasion are out, but 3-D takes them out. Sabin accidentally kicks Creed in the head, and Storm hits a Last Call on Sabin, then a D.W.I. on Creed.

Winners: Beer Money

Match Rating: 7/10

Lauren is with the Beautiful People, going to do something.

The BP are attacking Victoria/Terra, but she takes out the BP, with weapons. Love tries to run, and goes straight into a wall.

Tonight’s lineup and Slammiversery hype.

MEM interview coming up.

Lauren is with Daffney, talking about her issues with Wilde. Daffney says that crazy people have no logic; she’s there but not there. She has to hurt Taylor Wilde, oh and, she has voices in her head.

Tenay is with the Mafia, asking about Joe’s hitlist. Nash talks about being in the cage, but he needs to be the champ. To get to the MEM, he still has to get by Nash tonight, which will be hard. Booker T says that when the Mafia get hit, they’ll hit back. Steiner says that threats are a part of wrestling, but that fat SOB is trying to take us out. Kurt jumps in, that the MEM will annihilate Joe, talking like he’s still the Godfather. Sting calms him down, says that they are family. Then that they’ll take out Joe on their clock, his way.

Recap of the Beautiful People, Roxxi, Daffney, and Taylor Wilde, and eventually Abyss and Stevie.

Match 3: Daffney vs. Taylor Wilde

Wilde kicks out Daffney before the bell, and attacks hit outside the ring. Inside the ring, Wilde is punching her, but Stevie and Raven come out and distract her, and Daffney takes advantage. She hit’s a superman punch in the corner. She tries to hit an elbow, misses, and Wilde nails a missile dropkick. Stevie distracts, Daffney takes advantage, and hits the Lobotomy.

Winner: Daffney

Match Rating: 7/10

Daffney attacks after the match, but Stevie stops her. Raven says that for over a decade people were waiting for the Richards/Raven reunion. Why Abyss? Why not? He disobeyed Stevie, and didn’t fill the prescription. Quote the Raven, “Nevermore”.

JJ is coming out.

Recap of the EY and JJ issues.

JJ introduces EY. They go way back, and EY got his opportunity, but Jeff came out on top. Instead of respecting that, he jumped him. He tells Eric this can be over, or keep it going. The crowd chants “fight”. Eric mocks JJ. He talks about his father, and how Jeff was like one to him, talking about his accomplishments, and his home life. The American dream. They both had the same kind of childhoods, with bad fathers. But Jeff is becoming his father. He is concerned for Jeff’s daughters, who have to settle for 2nd place like Jeff did. Jeff snaps and they brawl. During it, Jeff KO’s Earl Hebner.

Mick Foley and JB. Mick thinks that Jeff has gone crazy, and needs security. Rocko and Sallyboy come in.

Jesse Neal (sailor) promo.

Lauren is with Rhino and Jesse, asking Jesse is he ready for Matt Morgan. He says that it’s the most difficult that he’s ever done, but its his dream, and wants to make it a reality.

Match 4: Matt Morgan vs. Jesse Neal

Jesse takes the advantage, locks in a headlock, but Morgan hits a back suplex. Morgan elbows him in the corner. He’s just toying with him. He does a modified throwing snake eyes. Goes for a pin, but breaks it. Carbon Footprint.

Winner: Matt Morgan

Match Rating: 5/10

Mick is coming out with security.

ODB training Deaner promo.

Mick Foley is out now. Next week, it’ll be Samoa “Taz 3.0″ Joe vs. Steiner and Booker in a Nation of Violence First Blood match. I’ll explain later. Sting vs. Kurt, qualifier. Mick picked up the security after Sting released them. He’s scared of JJ, that he’s snapped. For every action, theres a reaction, and next week, his reaction will be hardcore.

Sting is with JB, who asks about the match next week. Sting says that the MEM are stronger than ever and have momentum, so there will be no changes. Morgan comes in and wants in the Mafia. He insults Jesse while doing this. But Sting respects him because, well, he served us for four years. He tells Morgan to come back when he finds some respect.

JB is with Steiner and Booker. Basically, the match is two back to back first blood matches. Blah blah, Joe’s gonna get hurt. Whatever.

Match 5: Kevin Nash vs. Samoa Joe (Six Sides of Steel)

Both start off with kendo sticks. Joe gets the first hits in, but Kevin lands some back. Knees to Joe in the corner, then chokes Joe with the stick. Joe rams Kevins head into the cage.

Hits Kevin with a sign, then lands punches. Kevin hit’s a low blow and gets a garbage can lid. Three shots, and a 2 count. Lid shot to Nash now, but another on Joe. Joe hit’s a dropkick and a splash, then a rear naked choke. Then he breaks a hockey stick over Nash’s back. I like the Stanley cup hint. LET’S GO PENS!!!!!

Winner: Samoa Joe

Match Rating: 8/10

Show Rating: 7/10

The Play With Plague: TNA Report For 5/07/09

Welcome back everyone, to another TNA report. I’m going to start this off with addressing a comment that was made last week, other than you guys telling me I did a good job. Thanks by the way! Very Happy

I watch other wrestling first off, and TNA is my favorite. However, that won’t ever stop me from bashing people and stories that I don’t like or telling exactly what I think of the current show. If they put on a bad show, believe me, I’m going to be the one to tell you, and if they run too many promos, I’m get mad at them. That doesn’t mean I hate them. What good does it do you readers if I give a totally biased opinion of the show?
Now then, on with the show.

Preview:
Beer Money vs. Jethro Holiday & Eric Young (3-D Invitational)
Suicide vs. Consequences Creed (Non-Title Match)
Awesome Kong vs. Velvet Sky (Stretcher Match)
Main Event Mafia vs. The Frontline (10 Man War)

The show starts of in a very shocking manner, with the MEM. Kurt starts off continuing the rose metaphor from last week, and that last week he kicked Mick’s ass. What? Hmm, I remember it differently. He informs Foley that he is in the main event at Sacrifice, and then talks about the 10 Man War. Then he calls out Foley, and he tells Kurt that the match is about a show of power for the Frontline. Mick thought he was untouchable until last week, and yes, he’s still talking about his stitches. Kurt brings up that he won a Gold Medal with a broken neck. And like him or not, Kurt is a great wrestler, and it took some major balls to do that back in ’96. Then Mick tells Kurt that he will be the Godfather after Sacrifice, and JJ and AJ come out. Foley tells Jarrett that it was never personal, only business. JJ responds as expected, and tells Foley to kiss his ass. Kurt then asks, “Can’t we all just get along?” Wow. Some great lines here. Kurt just won the John Madden award for the week.

Backstage, Samoa “Taz 2.0″ Joe gets dropped off by someone. Wonder who?

MMG & Danials promo.

Match 1: Suicide vs. Consequences Creed (Non-Title)
Ok we start of with some quick holds and counters. Suicide gains the advantage, backs him into the corner and lays some head butts and clotheslines, and then an STO takedown. And throughout the match we are forced to listen to Don West accusing Suicide of being Danials. Creed takes advantage with a swinging neck breaker. Suicide and Creed battle with jabs, then Suicide dropkicks him, and then does his rolling samoan drop. Goes for the Suicide Solution and misses, and Creed hit’s a Trouble in Paradise. Suicide takes him to corner and does a mix between Jeff Hardy’s turnbuckle dropkick and a Codebreaker. Looked sweet.

Winner: Suicide

Good fast paced match. Two weeks in a row TNA starts with a great X-Division Match.

Match Rating: 7/10

Foley Promo

The Stuttering Steroid Machine is back with Foley. What came out of this is Morgan wants to prove himself to the Mafia. Mick gives him a match against MEM Security.

We come back to Lauren and 2/3′s of the Beautiful People. Loading gun…muzzle in mouth…please don’t say something stupid. Velvet is freaking out, and Love tells her to calm down. She beat Kong, so you can too. Then Velvet said what I was thinking. Um, no you didn’t. You beat Taylor Wilde. Love says…(grr)…Wilde, Kong. Same thing. My gun just jammed. Luckily I don’t have to take a second shot, the promos over.

MEM and Tenay promo. Kurt said love way too much.

Lauren is with Wilde now, and they start talking about Wilde’s secret admirer. She has a date on Tuesday and Lauren agrees to go with her. Why this was necessary, I can’t tell you.

JB is with Jarrett in a locker room, and asks him what he’s going to do about Mick Foley. JJ asks him to leave. That was underlined because he is the OWNER of TNA. He is in a locker room? Then JB asks Jeff what happened to his office? Jeff flips and JB runs.

Match 2: MEM Security vs. Matt Morgan
Not much really happened. We just saw Morgan be dominant. We saw him choke slam big Rocko. I think Mike Tenay confused him with Kevin Nash, because they were talking about him missing time with a staph infection in his elbow. Big dropkick to Rocko and a Carbon Footprint to Sallyboy.

Winner: Matt Morgan

Match Rating: 5/10. Just for the sheer power in this match.

JB is with Mick Foley. Mick says he may need to tweak his match, and wants JB to get the word out. JB says he can twitter his tweet. Wow such a kissass. Foley goes crazy and sounds like Cactus Jack a lot. He says that Jeff’s guitar causes too many problems and he’s banning it from ringside. I’m hoping he doesn’t have a split personality angle going.

Lauren is with EY and Holliday. Nothing important. Just whining.

3-D comes out to call the Invitational match with Tenay and West. They call Beer Money the tag team of the future.

Match 3: Beer Money vs. Eric Young and Trevor Murdoch
Starts off with Roode and Young. Some holds and counters, then Roode throws EY to his corner, and Storm kicks him into the back of the head, and then Roode spine busters him. Nicely done. Tenay mentions that JR recently said that there are no really hot tag teams. Maybe in WWE, but in TNA, tag team is going strong. One more reason I love TNA. Anywho, back in the ring, Beer Money suplex to EY. Roode throws Eric into the corner, who flips over and lands on the apron, shoulder to Roode and flip over. Eric tags in Holliday, Roode tags Storm, and Holliday starts cleaning house. Roode gets him from behind, and throws him into the ropes, blind tag by Young, and a springboard double dropkick to Beer Money. He hit’s a big leg drop on Storm. Murdoch almost hits Eric, and while distracted, Storm gets up, EY turns, and…Last Call!!! Then Roode comes in and does a sick double team finisher called the D.W.I. I missed what it stood more. Can someone tell me? Anyway…

Winners: Beer Money

Really good tag match

Match Rating: 8/10

Lauren is back with Kong and Saeed. Saeed talks about the Wrath of Kong. Pause. How much is Star Trek paying TNA!?! Seriously, this is ridiculous. Not only the commercials and the plugs, now we have to go this far!!! I’ll explain, for those who don’t understand. One of the Star Trek movies was, “The Wrath of Khan”. Now…with Kong…ya anyway. Kong spoke for the first time. She said, dumb blonde. Dead blonde!!! Good mike skills.

Match 4: Velvet Sky vs. Awesome Kong

Hebner once again clears the arena. Velvet actually gets a few shots in, but then Kong takes over. Implant Buster. And another. The fans chant “One more time”, and Kong obliges again. Okay I think that’s enough. A fourth one. Come on now those look good! No no no…a fifth Implant Buster. Onto the stretcher. Thank you, no she pulls her up again. Please no, don’t break them…Awesome Bomb. Oh well. Ten count.

Winner: Awesome Kong

Match Rating: 4/10

Dr. Stevie session. Daffney is going to be in the first female Monster Ball. Abyss has to help her. Whatever.

Lethal Consequences come out, and call out Danials. Same thing as last week, they accuse him of being Suicide. C.D. tells Creed he should worry more about beating Suicide than figuring out who he is. Oooooh. Now the MMG comes out and say next week they’ll unmask Suicide.

JB is with Jarrett again. He has some notes about all the things Foley is doing. Jeff asks what can he do? Sting comes in, and wants in the main event at Sacrifice if he pins Foley tonight. They shake on it.

Lauren is with Love, and she’s calling someone to be at the Impact Zone next week.

MEM Promo.

Match 5: MEM vs. Frontline (10 Man War)
Foley comes to the ring with a Barbed-Wire Baseball Bat. No problems there.

Steiner and Joe are in the ring. Suplex to Scott, then Joe tags in Danials. Diving cross body to Scott. But he takes control, and tags in Kurt. Both do some holds and takedowns. Danials kicks Kurt and tags in AJ, who does some inverted Codebreaker. Kurt rakes the eyes and tags Booker. Suplex, flying knee, then Booker lays AJ out with a spinning kick.

Angle and AJ are now in. No now Booker’s back, with a jump kick to AJ. Steiner now comes in with some Spinning Bearhug Slam. Tag to Angle. Going for the Angle Slam, miss, PELE! Sting and Foley get tagged in, and Foley gets the advantage. Everyone starts coming in, the MEM gets thrown out by the Frontline, then cross bodies or suicide dives. Kurt, Jeff, Foley, and Sting are left. Jeff low blows Angle, and picks up Mick’s bat. Foley takes it off of him and tries to swing it at Jeff, who ducks, and low blows Mick. Jeff does the Stroke, driving Foley’s face into the bat. Sting comes in for the cover.

Winners: Main Event Mafia

Match Rating: 10/10

Sting has a mike and explains that he is in the match at Sacrifice. Then he says that if he gets pinned, he’ll retire.
Overall: Really good show. Not a lot of promos, and better matches. I love the Ultimate Sacrifice thing where everyone in the match is putting something up. That’s a really good concept. And a big bombshell to end the show. As good as I could have hoped for.

Show Rating: 9/10